Unseen Moments From a New Life
by SpobyOTP
Summary: AU. These are a series of unseen moments that happened in and around my AU story "Fire and Rain." These moments include Damon and Elena's adopted daughter Alexandra, as well as moments that were previously cut from the original story. I hope you all enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**Alexandra Has a Nightmare**

Alexandra Salvatore was normally not a child who was prone to having too many nightmares, even though she had all the reasons in the world to suffer from its cruel clutches: at ten, she had been cruelly turned into a vampire by the hands of her adoptive father's ex-best friend after her parents were found to have been sympathizers to the Augustine society, a group of people who captured and tortured vampires.

After that, she was forced to endure a life far beyond anything she ever thought was possible before. Her entire world had been turned upside down with the knowledge of what she was, and all that she had to accomplish in order to make sure she survived through the uncertainty and chaos of a world that was at war, and a world that longed to see species of her kind, destroyed.

What saved Alexandra was the loving bond she shared with her parents and family and friends that she surrounded herself with. In particular, she enjoyed a close and loving bond with her father, Damon Salvatore. He had been the one to feed her the blood that had completed her transition, and had been the one to also carry her home after finding her in a dark alleyway after the initial attack.

She was also fortunate to have a close relationship with her mother, Elena, and her uncle Stefan and the friends and family they surrounded themselves with. Even though it had been hard at first, she had gotten over the initial stages of grief and shock over the loss of her maternal parents and had adjusted (somewhat precariously) to the loss of her biological family and had learned to thrive with the cravings and blood lust that was a part of her new life.

Sometimes though, when she least expected it, the nightmares _did _come and snatch her up like the prey they assumed she was as she wrestled with their terrifying grasp. When she was younger, her father used to tell her that nightmares were just her mind's way of emptying all the unneeded junk in her mind, but that did little to help her when she was terrified and shaken by the images and sensations that flooded through her mind.

Tonight was no different; she could not even remember what the actual dream was, only that it was bad enough to jolt her to full awareness as she clutched her pillow with a vice-like grip, her screams muffled by blanket that was still wrapped around her slender body as she flailed around, trying to get free from what she still believed were the enemies of her subconscious.

It was only when light suddenly flooded into her room that she overcame much of her initial terror as she looked up at the sound of a pair of footsteps and then the eventual sag of her mattress as her father's body weight created added pressure to it.

Not able to keep the tears from falling down her face, she untangled herself as much as she could from the mess of the blankets and launched herself into the first pair of arms that she could find that she knew would bring her comfort.

"Hey," Damon said softly, raising his hand to brush away some of the tears that had stuck themselves to Alexandra like glue. "What happened, sweetheart?"

"I—I," she gulped, her voice trembling as she tried to forget the ugly images that were still parading across her mind. "I had a bad—bad dream."

"Oh, really?" Damon said, still speaking as softly as ever. "Why don't you tell your Mom and me about it."

Looking over at the mention of her mother, she was rewarded with the sight of Elena as she sat down on Damon's other side, reaching for her daughter's hand as she gently smoothed her hair back behind her ear, a comforting motion that Alexandra relied upon during times like this.

"It was—it was really scary," Alexandra said, as she fisted Damon's shirt in her small hand.

"What did you see?" Elena asked, switching from her hair to now rubbing Alexandra's back in small, soothing motions.

"I saw Enzo. He was—he was in my room the night he hurt me. I remember everything that he did to me again."

Over the last few months since her traumatizing turn, Alexandra had, for the most part, recovered from the tragic circumstances in which she had come into Damon and Elena's lives, but the after-shocks of something so horrible, still remained in her mind.

"Baby," Elena said, curling her finger under Alexandra's chin. "Enzo is gone. Dad killed him, remember?"

Alexandra nodded. "I remember."

"You know that he can never hurt you again."

"I know."

"Dreams can be scary, can't they?"

Alexandra nodded. "I don't like how they make me feel."

It was a strange feeling: on the one hand, she knew better than to believe they were actually happening. On the other hand, it all felt so real in her mind that it was hard not to take them all seriously when they happened because of how realistic those dreams actually were.

"No one does," Damon said with a slight laugh. "I have a suggestion for you," he added, tapping her nose with his finger. "We can either go back to sleep, or we can go out in the kitchen and get some warm milk."

"Warm milk?" Alexandra asked, wrinkling her nose as she turned to face Damon again.

"It's a little trick that my Mom taught me years and years ago."

"Okay," Alexandra agreed, allowing herself to step down onto the hardwood floor, her feet coming into contact with the cold flooring as she walked out ahead of her Mom and Dad and into the spacious kitchen that doubled as a meeting and gathering area for most days.

"Two hot milks coming right up," Damon said, as he lifted his daughter onto the counter next to him. "Your Mom likes this too."

"The way _you _make it," Elena corrected him, walking up behind him and wrapping her arms around his waist. "Any other hidden talents, Mr. Salvatore?"

"None that you don't already know about," Damon replied, arching his eyebrows suggestively.

"Get a room!" Alexandra teased, laughing as she said it.

"I think we have an audience," Damon said, smirking against Elena's lips before regrettably pulling away to finish making the milk.

"I think we do," Elena agreed. "A ten-year-old angel who is wearing Disney-Princess pajamas and has her hair in a braid."

It was a nightly ritual for Alexandra to go to bed wearing a selection of Disney pajamas—normally in the form of one of her favorite Princesses, and have Elena weave her hair into either a single braid or two neat ones.

That particular night she had elected to sleep in a single braid. Even though it was slightly askew from the tossing and turning it had endured, it still remained mostly in place and as perky as ever.

"Who's that?" Alexandra asked, deciding to play along, even though her brain was still making the transition from sleep to full awareness.

"I," Elena said, as she walked toward her slowly, "have no idea," she finished as she suddenly started a tickle attack on the little girl's sensitive stomach.

"No, Mommy! No, Mommy!" Alexandra yelled, squealing in delight as she tried her hardest to squirm out of her mother's grasp.

Once she finally succeeded in doing that, she looked next to her expectantly as Damon place a cup of hot milk next to her. Taking the handle carefully, she slowly placed the edge against her waiting lips and took a small gulp.

"Is it good?" Damon asked.

Alexandra took awhile to answer as she carefully swished the milk around in her mouth, her heightened taste buds working to figure out if they approved or not of something that was strictly the blood diet she hated and resisted with all her might.

"Yes."

"Good. You have a little," Damon said, gesturing to his mouth. "Milk mustache."

"Got milk?" Alexandra retaliated, as she flung some of the milk she managed to get on her fingers, in Damon's face.

"That's not fair," Damon replied with a fake pout. "You messed up my hero hair!"

"It could use a little grooming anyways."

"Oh it could, could it?" Damon demanded, as he stepped foreword and swept Alexandra off the counter, throwing her over his shoulder like she was a sack of potatoes.

"Yes!" Alexandra said, wiggling in his arms as he carried her back down the hallway to her room. "Put me down!"

"Your wish, my command," Damon said, as plopped her down on her soft, springy mattress. "Do you feel better, princess?"

"Yes."

"Good. Do you feel like you can go back to sleep?"

"I think so."

"Good," Elena said, as she stepped in to tuck the blankets securely around her child. "I love you."

"I love you too, Mommy."

* * *

**This is based off my story "Fire and Rain" which is an AU of seasons 5 and 6 of the Vampire Diaries, and centering around the discovery of a little girl, Alexandra, who Damon and Elena adopted after finding out she was in the midst of an ugly transition into a vampire.**

**These are a series of one-shots that are in no particular order. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Confusion and Anger**

Two days.

Forty-eight hours, and a handful of seconds and minutes since Alexandra's entire world had been shattered yet again. The passage of time meant little in the grand scheme of things, especially to one who was immortal like she and her family were, but it was the passage of time that only succeeded in creating yet another dent in her heart, and made her question nearly everything about the world she once thought was so fun and innocent and enjoyable.

She didn't think like that anymore.

No longer did Alexandra harbor any grandiose illusions about the world that had taken her entire biological family from her, had turned her into a creature who she used to enjoy reading about in her books, and had now taken her father away from her, the man who had not only taken her in and adopted her as his own, but had fed her the blood which had completed her transition from human to vampire.

It had been two days since Elena had come back to the apartment they had fled to after the Traveler spell had taken affect, and informed her, with tears clogging the back of her throat, that Damon was gone. The powers that be had taken him from them, had made it impossible for him to return to his family after embarking on a dangerous (and suicidal) mission to save the ones they loved from the Other Side before it collapsed.

Unfortunately, much to her confusion, he was the one who ended up drawing the short end of the stick, and had been trapped when the spell which had been brought forth to ensure his revival, had stopped unexpectedly, with the witch who had been doing it, nowhere to be seen.

It was a turn of events that Alexandra, at ten, was struggling to comprehend. Even though she was unusually intelligent for her age, there were still certain aspects of the world that she had no idea of and death and what had happened to her (and now her father), was one of those things.

She missed Damon.

She missed the bond they had already formed.

She missed having a dad again—she missed the games and jokes they would play—and the way Damon would often sneak up on her and tickle her sides until she screamed for mercy, and she missed the loving support he and Elena both gave to her.

Sniffling back the set of tears that had been threatening to fall all afternoon long, she drew her knees up tight against her body and tried to avoid looking at the framed photograph of she and her parents. It was done only recently, one of the few and only mementos she had of the three of them.

She was interrupted in her private time of reflection and confusion, by a gentle knock on the other side of the door. In an apartment that was full of people, time alone was rare, especially for her when the adults that constantly surrounded her, wanted to make sure that she was alright.

It was a gesture she appreciated and needed.

"Hey, baby," Elena said, as she made her appearance. "I wanted to see how you were."

"I'm o-okay," Alexandra said, covering the slight tremor in her voice with a hiccup. "I couldn't sleep."

As Elena walked closer to her and sat down next to her, transferring her from her seated position on the bed to one on her lap, Alexandra could tell just how much pain her mother was in from Damon's death. The bags under her eyes would have been a dead giveaway on its own, but she could also see the paleness of her skin, signaling that she had either not fed recently, or had obtained from getting the proper nutrients she needed.

"I know the feeling," Elena said, squeezing her softly. "What were you thinking about?"

"Who says I was thinking about anything?" Alexandra asked, raising an eyebrow in question.

"Let's just call it a woman's intuition."

Alexandra couldn't argue with that logic. Instead of presenting her mother with a sassy remark like she usually would have, she instead presented her with the photograph she had been studying.

"Remember this?" Alexandra asked, speaking quietly so she would not give away the fact of how much pain she was in over Damon's passing. "We were at the lake house, and Dad decided to throw me in the water."

"I remember," Elena said, as she looked down at the picture of the three of them.

It was taken right after they had found Alexandra and she had completed her transition. Instead of making her stay in the same town in which she had met her brutal end as a human, they both had thought it smart to take her away from that setting and take her someplace light and fun like the lake house.

"And I jumped out of the water and threw that fish in his face!" Alexandra said, laughing in spite of herself at the memory that vacation presented.

"Dad didn't like to swim all that much, but he sure enjoyed throwing people in, didn't he?"

"Yeah. I miss that. I know I was only there once, but I still miss it, you know?"

"I do," Elena said, as she rested her head lightly on top of her daughter's. "I like that shampoo I got you. It smells like fruit."

"It's strawberry. My old Mommy used to get me mango-smelling stuff, but I like this better."

"So do I."

"Mom?"

"Hmm?"

"Is it okay to be...angry?" Alexandra asked, as she toyed with the silver bracelet which held the crucial component of the lapsis lazuli gemstone that kept she and her family from frying in the sunlight.

She had been struggling with her intense feelings of loss that was occasionally overpowered by her even deeper feelings of anger and confusion over why the world thought it was acceptable for her to lose someone else important.

It didn't seem fair to her.

"Angry about what?" Elena asked gently, as she used her fingers to comb through her daughter's hair.

"D-dad," Alexandra said, choking back a sob, her carefully composed composure gone in a single second as she crumbled after two days of denying herself the urge to let go and cry, figuring she would never be able to stop if she let herself go like that.

"Angry that he's gone?" Elena prompted, her own eyes shining with tears. "Yeah. Yeah it's okay to feel angry, baby, I do too."

"You _do_?" Alexandra asked, looking up at her.

"I feel angry that Luke stopped Liv from completing the spell. I feel angry that he's gone from us when we just found you and started our beautiful family together, and I feel angry that he's not here to tuck you in with me at night, and he's not here to tell you bedtime stories."

"He always makes the funniest voices," Alexandra recalled.

"Hey, I can do a pretty amazing Popeye impression," Elena retorted.

"Prove it," Alexandra said, leveling her gaze on Elena.

"Tonight."

"Okay," Alexandra said, as she snuggled in closer to her Mom. "Do you think we'll ever be able to get him back?"

She had overheard her family brainstorming ways they could get back Damon and Bonnie. Most of the plans involved asking the witches for help, or using alternate means, none of which seemed desirable or even achievable.

"I think so."

"How?"

"If worst comes to worst, we'll have to ask Liv and Luke if they can help us."

It was the last route Elena wanted to travel to, but she knew that if it was a choice between getting her boyfriend and best friend back and ignoring the betrayal Liv and Luke had given them, she would easily go with the former.

"What if they can't?"

"Then...we'll keep searching until there's absolutely no other avenue to go down."

In the state of mind she was currently in, Elena would absolutely not allow herself to think about what would happen if she couldn't get Damon back. It was absolutely inconceivable to her that this loss had the potential of being permanent.

"Okay."

"Don't you worry," Elena reminded her firmly. "We'll get Dad back, okay?"

"Okay."


	3. Chapter 3

**Please Come Back To Me**

The night was still. It was one of those rare nights where the fireflies were out in abundance and the air was quiet, pleasantly warm like the summers Elena used to enjoy out on her family's patio as they used to indulge in plentiful jugs of tea and lemonade courtesy of her mother's expert hand in the kitchen. It was those nights that Elena missed the most about her old life, and that of her parents and the childhood she had enjoyed with them.

Now all that was left of those precious moments, were the memories that she would carry with her for the rest of her eternity. Now instead of looking up and seeing the same fireflies and night bugs that buzzed around her head, she saw headstone after headstone as she carefully picked her way across the cemetery to the crypt that stood alone and foreboding near the end of the line.

It was the last place she had felt Damon's presence after being informed of his death, when they had been granted a few moments alone together, with one side not able to view or see the other at all other than to feel occasional wisps of a touch, or the movement of her hair. It was a moment Elena had carried with her for the last week, ever since being forced to admit defeat and return to the apartment they had taken up residence in.

Now was the only time she felt the inner strength needed to make this trip back. It was all because of Luke. In a blind panic and rage at not being able to see him when she needed it most, and after watching her daughter break down like she had, she knew the time had come for answers, whether they were temporary or not, and what she had gotten from him, had been the only thing strong enough to induce the visions she wanted.

Hallucinations, really, but something tangible to her mind that would temporarily suffice for the absence of the real thing. As she eased open the door that moaned and whined at the slightest disturbance from its overuse and old age, she began to wonder if she was beginning to honestly lose her mind to be willing to go so far as to take witch drugs to allow her mind the blessed few minutes with Damon.

Luke had given her a stash big enough to last her a few days, but it wasn't the amount she was worried about. She was worried about her already floundering ability to cope with this loss, and while she would eagerly take anything to be able to see him again, she was worried that she was crossing the line into territory that should never ever be explored, even if the method being used was something that was considered "safe."

The only reason she was able to keep a somewhat stable, sane head on the outside, was solely because of Alexandra. She was the reason Elena had so far resisted the urge to shut her emotions off to forgo the horrific pain her mind and soul was in, but it was when she was alone and without the calming influence of her daughter, that she began to notice most, the affect Damon's death had on her.

Sighing softly once she reached the center of the room, she dug in her pocket for the small pouch of the powder-like material that would aid her in catching a glimpse of Damon, even if it was only in the form of hallucinations induced by her mind that was being controlled by the drugs.

Taking a deep breath once she had shaken some of the powder out on the bare palm of her hand, she lit the candle with her other hand to jump-start the specifications noted by Luke that would make his appearance stronger.

Closing her eyes, feeling the remains of new tears begin to take place of the old ones, she inhaled some of the powder, choking back slightly when the dryness hit her throat like a harsh drought. It didn't matter, though, not if the momentary discomfort would dissolve to take the place of the one she was missing the most.

As she waited, she focused on the outside sounds. There was nothing out there. The graveyard was unusually quiet, a perfect time and place for her to conduct this ritual.

She felt him before she actually saw him. The candles which had been burning steadily, suddenly flickered to announce his presence. Feeling every single muscle she had in her possession, tense, she looked around in response to what the candles were doing, fully expecting to see a physical image of him that was lifelike, but only with the realization that he was not.

Instead, what she saw was nothing but the same crypt that she had secretly been sneaking away to to write in her journal, something she had long since neglected, but had recently taken up the hobby again after the recent events in her life.

"Damon?" she called, knowing how foolish it sounded when there was no evidence of him being there with her.

Either the spell had failed, or there had never been a solution like this to begin with.

Again, she felt his presence, stronger now. Closing her eyes, she felt a certain warmth on her cheekbones that she knew could not be logically explained away by the weather or anything she was feeling inside that would warrant her to blush.

Opening her eyes, she felt all the air rush out of her dead lungs as she took a step back. He was there; whether it was his spirit or a hallucination, she didn't care. It didn't matter so long as he was there and was able to communicate with her like she wanted him to all along.

"Damon?" she asked again, but with a little bit more confidence now that she could see him for herself.

"Oh, Elena," Damon said, as he took a few steps toward her until he was standing directly in front of her, his fingers moving tenderly along her cheek. "Baby, what have you done to yourself? Huh?"

Elena shook her head, feeling tears of complete and utter frustration leak out of her eyes. "You have no idea, Damon. I've been trying to find ways to—to see you, and this is the only way."

"This isn't right, Elena. Or healthy."

"It's the only way that I can see you," Elena reminded him. "And feel you."

She never thought that the spell would work to such a degree that she would be able to actually feel his touch on her cheek, but she could. It was everything she had hoped for and more.

"I know," Damon said softly, in that perfect imitation of the sotto voce that he had perfected with her. "But you need to move on, Elena."

The words hit her like she was being slapped. Not because he was proposing it, she knew why he was, but it was the realization that he was expecting her to go on with her life like their love had never existed, like they had never built this incredible family together.

"_What_?" She demanded. "Damon, no-"

"You need to move on," Damon said gently, as his fingers caught some tears that had managed to slip past her walls. "You still have people that need you. They need that warrior princess that I _know_ you can be."

"How? I can't—I can't do this, Damon. I can't handle you being gone. I can't stop loving you. I can't move on, and I don't want to."

If she entertained the idea of moving on, that would make it feel like to her that their entire love had been cheap. It was something that had been good and existed in the moment, but when the worst happened and she moved on, she would feel like it was wrong, and she knew it was.

"And I love you for that," Damon said, capturing her gaze in his. "But our daughter? She needs you right now, Elena. She needs her Mom."

"We _both_ need you."

"I know you do," Damon said, nothing in his voice but resignation. "But I can't be there right now, Elena. It hurts me to say this to you right now, but I literally cannot."

"Damon-"

"I would trade my right arm if it meant I could come home with you and see our little girl, but I can't, baby."

"Please don't say this to me right now-"

"Caroline needs you. She needs someone to tell her when she's being an annoying pain in the ass. Jeremy needs you because he needs someone to keep him from falling over the brink again-"

"Jeremy?" Elena interjected, her eyes widening in disbelief. "What—what are you talking about?"

Not that she had been paying much attention to anything other than herself and Alexandra, but she would have assumed she would have noticed if her baby brother had suddenly started falling back into old habits.

"He comes here every morning and brings some new flowers and brings a new picture. While he's here he puts on Air Supply's greatest hits and drinks."

"I—I didn't know-"

"It's okay," Damon said, rushing to reassure her. "But he needs you right now. So does Alexandra, and so does Stefan, even."

"I can't keep losing people. I was supposed to have this end when I chose to stay a vampire and be with you. This was supposed to be over with."

"It's just our sucky luck," Damon said, with an easy smile, but one that Elena knew was forced for her benefit.

"We're talking to Liv and Luke, Damon. There could still be _hope_."

"I hope there is."

"But you still want me to move on-"

"Yes. In the meantime, until you get an answer from the witches, you need to go home and you need to put on your best "Elena Gilbert can kick ass" look, and you need to be the kind of mother that I am so damn proud of."

Elena shook her head, feeling her entire body shake with uncontrollable sobs. "I need you."

"I know you do."

"Who else is going to be there with me to tuck Alexandra into bed and read her bedtime stories?"

"I remember," Damon said, with a shaky smile. "I was always the whip at making impressions and you sat there snorting."

"Shut up," Elena said, throwing him her best irritated glance that failed miserably. "Who's going to be there when we go to the lake house and she needs someone to throw her in the water? Who's going to be there to tell me when I'm being an idiot for worrying all the time?"

"Elena-"

"Who's going to be there to be one of the best boyfriends in existence, and an even better father?"

"Do you want to know a secret?" Damon asked.

"What?" Elena asked skeptically, not sure if he was trying to pull something over her.

"That I have been watching over you every second of every day for the past week. I have watched you, Elena, and I have watched Alexandra and Stefan and Caroline."

"You _have_?"

"Yes." 

It would certainly explain the brief and momentary flashes of peace Elena had occasionally experienced since the tragedy, and it would explain why she would, at times, feel her hair move, or her hand being nudged.

"I think I've felt you at times, now that I think about it."

"Can you remember something for me, Elena?" Damon asked, as he used his hand to work its way through her rat nest of a hair, carefully moving and untangling every single snarl that had made its home in her head.

"Anything," Elena said, nodding resolutely, closing her eyes as she tried to memorize the unique and calm way he used his hand to help her with her tangles. "What is it?"

"Remember that in 173 years of living on this earth, I've only really loved once. Can you remember that you, Elena Gilbert, were my epitome of a fulfilled life? You and Alexandra? You two made my life mean something."

Elena nodded, now no longer able to see past the flood of her tears. "Yes," she gasped.

"Can you remember," Damon said, as his hand moved down to cup her cheek. "That you are the single greatest thing to ever happen to me?"

"I will."

"Can you tell Alexandra that her Dad loves her very much?"

Elena nodded; beyond the ability to speak by now.

"D—Damon-"

"I love you, Elena. I love you so much. I want you to remember me, but seeing you in this amount of pain, hurts me too, you know."

"I'm sorry-" Elena said, scrambling for a way to verbalize what she was trying to say.

"Shh," Damon said soothingly. "Don't apologize for loving me, Elena. That's always been one of your best and greatest qualities."

"I can't argue with that."

"Right now," Damon said. "You're going to go home and you're going to tuck Alexandra into bed and you're going to tell her that whenever she has a bad dream, I'll be the one chasing the monsters away. You'll tell her that I'll be the peace she feels when she wakes up afraid, and as for you, you'll know I'm with you when you feel your gorgeous hair move, and you'll know it when you feel your hand being tugged and don't know where it's coming from."

Elena nodded. "I will do anything in my power to bring you back home, Damon."

"I know you will. Your stubbornness won't allow for anything else, but until (and _if_) that happens, you will go home and do exactly what I just said for both your benefit and our child."

"I love you," Elena sobbed. "I'm so sorry it took me so long to figure that out."

"It's okay, Elena," Damon soothed. "It's alright. I need you to stop crying. I would hate for our last moments together to be like this because when you cry, I want to cry and then it's a huge mess."

"Yeah," Elena said, forcing a laugh out of her mouth. "You're right."

"I also wanted to tell you that I'm not alone where I'm at. Witchy is with me."

"B-Bonnie?"

Damon nodded. "I can't promise that we don't get on each others last nerve ninety-five percent of the time, but she's with me and she's okay."

Elena nodded, not able to raise enough awareness to stop the influx of tears as they slid smoothly into her mouth. "Thank you." She was relieved that Damon was not alone in whatever world he had found himself in, and that he had Bonnie to keep him company.

In that instant, though, she felt a brief pang of jealousy that her friend had something that she would do just about anything to have for herself again. It was selfish, she knew that, but she also could not help it when she was staring at Damon in the face, and knew their time together was about to draw to a close.

Reacting instinctively, she raised her arms to secure them around his neck, and then stopped. Would it still feel the same? Would his skin still feel warm and inviting? Or would he feel cold? The brief touches he had graced her with, had been nothing but perfection but she couldn't be sure.

"Do I have cooties or something?" Damon teased, but with none of the spark that was usually present in his eyes.

"I'm just worried that it won't...feel the same."

Damon shook his head in amusement. "Come here."

Obliging, Elena wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling herself closer to him until all that existed in that moment was an inch between them, which is exactly how she preferred it to be.

"I love you, Damon Salvatore."

"And I love you, Elena Gilbert."

Closing her eyes to savor as much of his unique and special smell as she could, she buried her head in his shoulder until she could feel his lips brush across her forehead.

Raising her head, she forced herself to look at him one last time. "This isn't goodbye."

"No," Damon confirmed, as his lips slowly swept across hers. "This is...until we find a way."


	4. Chapter 4

**He Is with Us Everywhere**

The tears had hardly dried on Elena Gilbert's face as she steered her car back in the direction of the lake house. She had gone to the crypt in the hopes of forging a connection with Damon after nearly a week of silence, and while she had accomplished that and more, it was the sense of brutal finality that came with his death that she was not prepared for as she turned on the private section of road that led to her second home.

Raising a trembling hand to swipe away the tears before her daughter could see them, she tried to memorize his touch, how his hand had effortlessly worked its way across her face in the way that was most definitely meant to soothe her, instead of sadden her more. She tried to remember the way in which he had gotten rid of once painful snarls in her hair, without even hardly hurting her.

Damon was a master at the simple touch—at the touch that was often left under—appreciated by many, but was one of the minute things about him she had learned to more or less treasure as their relationship deepened over time. Taking a lock of the same hair in her hand, she examined the tendrils of it, trying to claim the memory of Damon touching her only minutes previously so she could hold onto it and never let it go, at least until he came back for real.

Shaking her head as she pulled into the driveway of the lake house, she could hear the faint sounds of laughter coming in from either the living room or kitchen. Her vampire hearing wasn't so good that it would be able to pick up where the distinct sounds were coming from. She could hear Stefan say something in jest to Jeremy, accompanied by the sounds of different dishes and pans clanging together in preparation for dinner.

It was the typical sounds that you would expect to hear coming from a family home. Once upon a time, it was everything Elena had ever wanted for herself and Damon, but now that one half of them was gone, those sounds only served to remind her of how much they had all lost. Not just herself, but Stefan and Alexandra, and even Jeremy with the loss of Bonnie.

Before Elena could even wrap her mind around what her emotions were doing to her, her body quickly changed from one of peaceful calmness, to complete violent shakes as her entire body shook with the force of her sobs as she tried desperately to put a handle on it before anyone could hear her.

It was more than losing Damon this time.

It was the realization of what he was missing.

It was the realization that her family would never be complete without he and Bonnie, and it was the realization that their little girl, who had suffered through so much loss in her short years of life, was going through yet another harsh separation with the death of her father.

"Don't do this to me," Elena sobbed, banging her hand against the steering wheel, grateful that her erratic movements didn't sound the horn. "I know you can hear me. I know you can see me."

She wasn't even sure what she was trying to communicate to him. She wasn't sure if she was berating him for leaving her, or if she was trying to reach the part of Damon that would be able to reach out and comfort her, like he hinted to her he was able to do.

"Don't leave me like this," she cried. "I need you."

That word had been playing on a loop in her head ever since it had first come to mind, but it was the complete and devastating truth. She had gone from unadulterated hatred of the man who would eventually claim her heart, to now falling apart at the seams in his heartbreaking absence.

In the midst of her grief, she barely noticed it when her drivers side door opened, and Stefan looked in on her. His face, (when she finally pulled herself together to notice the appearance of an onlooker in her grief), was carefully composed into the type of mask that was designed to help her through her grief.

"Elena," Stefan said, nothing in his voice but carefully controlled empathy. "It's okay, it's alright."

"It's not okay," Elena cried, shaking her head. "It's not okay, Stefan."

"Shh," Stefan soothed, as he helped her unbuckle her seatbelt and get out of the car. "Tell me what happened."

"I saw Damon..."

"You...saw him?" Stefan repeated, pausing in his steps as he tried to get her into the house. "What do you mean you 'saw' him?"

"It's a long story, Stefan," Elena mumbled, not particularly interested in letting him in on her brief drug usage in order to hallucinate her dead boyfriend. "Where's—Where's Alexandra?" If there was one person who would be able to soothe some of her pain, it would be her daughter.

"She's in the living room with Jeremy."

"I need to see her," Elena replied resolutely.

"Are you sure that's a good idea with how upset you are right now?"

"I can handle it," Elena affirmed with a nod. "I just need to see her."

Stefan nodded, knowing better than to argue with her when she was as upset as she was. Letting her through the open door, she followed him into the living room where Alexandra was seated on the floor, her hair askew as she had obviously just finished a high-energy game with her uncles.

"Hi, Mommy!" the little girl greeted enthusiastically. "We were playing tag!"

"I can see that," Elena said, quietly inhaling a deep breath so as not to break down in front of her baby girl. "Who won?"

"That's up for debate," Jeremy interjected. "Her skills were top-notch, but she cheated a few times."

"I did not!" Alexandra rebutted.

"Yes, you did! You weren't supposed to use your vampire speed—those were the rules—and you did. _Twice_."

"Jer," Elena said, "are you _really_ going to argue with a ten-year-old?"

"I guess not," Jeremy said, shrugging, "but I still won."

Elena ignored him as she took the corner to the bedroom she used to share with Damon, with Alexandra following closely behind. She was not sure what she planned on divulging about her encounter with Damon, but she knew it would have to be in words she could understand herself.

"Mommy, are you okay?" Alexandra asked, perhaps seeing the look on Elena's face as she stripped off her muggy clothes in favor of some comfortable sweats and a tank top.

"Yeah, I'm good. I'm just missing your Dad right now."

Over the last week since Damon had died, she and Alexandra had shared an open dialogue when it concerned their mutual feelings of loss and mourning. It was therapeutic for Alexandra, and an absolute must for Elena.

"I am too," Alexandra admitted, as she followed Elena's footsteps and laid down next to her on the bed she used to have fun in with both of her parents. "Does that icky feeling ever go away?"

"What icky feeling?"

"This pain in my chest," Alexandra said quietly, placing her hand over her heart. "It hurts whenever I think about Daddy."

"Oh, baby," Elena said gently, as she wrapped her arms around her daughter. "It's because you miss him a lot, just like I do."

"Does it ever go away?"

Elena nodded, resting her head softly on top of her daughter's. "It dulls over time. I don't think it ever completely leaves you, but over time the pain will be replaced with happy thoughts and memories you have of Dad."

"Was it like that with you when you lost _your_ Mom and Dad?" Alexandra asked, as she shifted her position to rest her head on her Mom's chest.

"Yeah. I still think about them, and I still miss them, especially when something really fun happens and they aren't here to share in the joy of that, but the pain I felt when they first died, has gotten less and less over time."

"But it's still there?" Alexandra pressed.

"Yeah," Elena whispered in affirmation. "It is."

Looking down at her ten-year-old child that she had found when she was on the brink of her transition after losing her entire family, she cursed the universe for creating more pain and confusion for someone who had had enough of it to last her several lifetimes.

"Do you know what I'm scared of?"

"What?" Elena asked.

"I'm scared I'll forget things about Daddy. Like, the important stuff. How he used to play with me, how he did my hair for me sometimes when you couldn't, and I'm scared I'll remember those epic times."

"You don't ever have to be scared of that," Elena told her firmly. "Because you know why?"

"Why?" Alexandra asked curiously, in spite of herself.

"Because," Elena began, as a few tears fell down her face. "Daddy is with us everywhere. He is the peace that you feel when you have a really scary dream when you wake up, and he is the smile that is on your face when you think of something funny."

"Wow. I never thought of it like that."

"He is with us everywhere, baby. You can't see him, but you know that he is here with me and you always. When you feel a little tickle on your cheeks, that's him playing with you. When you feel your hair move, that's him also."

"So it's like he's with us still?"

"That's exactly right. We just can't see him like before, but he is as much a part of us as he was before, even more now."

"Okay," Alexandra said with a nod. "That makes me feel a little better."

"I'm glad."


	5. Chapter 5

**The First Night Back**

It seemed too good to be true. It seemed impossible to Elena that she could grieve for Damon so profusely and so hard for so many weeks and then have the solution be right in front of them in the form of the witches who had been the ones, ironically, to betray them. Still, Elena could care less who the people were who had brought her boyfriend back to life. All that mattered to her, was that he was there, and currently engaged in a ferocious tickling match with an ecstatic Alexandra.

The hardest part about losing Damon had not only been her intense grief and suffering over the shocking loss, it had been watching her daughter crumble with the heartbreaking knowledge that not only had she lost her biological parents, but had now lost one half of her new ones. It was whirlwind for both of them, and as Elena watched them play and interact for the first time in weeks, she honestly wondered how they both had managed to survive it.

As she watched them, she could not fight the smile that crept across her mouth as Damon easily overpowered Alexandra and sprinkled her stomach with a series of tickles and blows with his mouth that left her screeching for mercy as she clawed uselessly at any part of him she could reach.

"D-Dad! S-Stop!" she begged, not able to completely get the words out when her entire body was shaking with hysterical laughs. It was this sight that Elena had mourned the most, the sight of them acting like an actual family for once, and enjoying regular, fun playtime with one another.

"You're gonna have to make me," Damon teased, the smile that he had been wearing ever since he walked through the door and saw his daughter, still firmly written across his face.

"H-How?"

"She has a good point," Elena remarked, as she tore herself away from the wall and walked behind her man to wrap her arms around his neck. "Why don't we stop the tickle wars and go to bed for the night?"

If it was up to her, she would celebrate Damon's return for as long as she could draw breath, but her natural tiredness that had remained long after her death, was demanding to be told a different story, and there was no conceivable way she would allow Alexandra to stay up past her carefully structured bedtime.

"I think you're Mom's right," Damon whispered playfully to his child. "I think we better get up and at 'em and get your teeth brushed and into your PJ's."

"What if I don't want to?" Alexandra teased.

"Then you will suffer _very_ severe consequences," Elena proclaimed mock-seriously. "Come on, let's go, and then you can spend some quiet time with Daddy and me before you go to sleep."

"Okay!"

That seemed to be all the encouragement she needed to go into the bathroom and brush her teeth, with the supervision of Elena to make sure she did a thorough enough job, and then bounced off to her room, (which was situated right next to her parent's), and put on her comfiest pair of PJ's that she could find.

When she trounced next door to where her parent's bedroom was, she found them already in bed waiting for her. Without wasting a second, she took a flying leap and landed in the middle of the mess of blankets and pillows that went flying.

"Are you an aerial artist?" Damon joked, pretending to take cover when the blankets and pillows did.

"In another life."

"Ah, I see."

"Show Dad what pajamas you're wearing," Elena said, noticing the ones she was wearing, were the same ones she had gotten for her a few days previously.

"These ones," Alexandra said, balancing herself on her knees as she showed Damon the front of her outfit.

"Hmm," Damon said thoughtfully, as he pretended not to know the correct Disney character that was on her top. "Let me see...Belle, right?"

"No! It's Ariel."

"Oh! I forgot. Silly me."

"Daddy, that's my favorite movie _ever_!"

"I know it is," Damon said, shaking his head in amusement. "Tell me what's so special about those Disney movies you love so much?"

"They're funny!" Alexandra defended. "And they have princes and fairies and mermaids."

"And a _whole_ lot of fluff."

"Like bunnies?" Alexandra asked, raising an eyebrow in question.

"Sort of...I think," Damon said, obviously thinking over his poor choice of words.

"Are you really back?" Alexandra asked, as she shifted from sitting on the comfortable bed to laying between her parents.

"Yes," Damon confirmed, lightly tickling her sides. "I am really back. For _good_."

"How?"

"The witches came through. Who would have thunk it?"

Alexandra smiled, clearly just content to lay there and revel in the fact that her father was back again. It was something she had hoped for for so long, and now that it was finally there, she almost wasn't sure what to do with herself.

"Can I stay in here with you guys tonight?"

Sometimes Damon and Elena would allow Alexandra to sleep with them whenever she got scared, or felt lonely in her room. It was a somewhat regular happening, and she was hopeful that she would be allowed to this time.

"I think," Elena said, "that you can stay in here with us until you fall asleep. After that, one of us will take you back to your room."

Alexandra nodded, trying to be content with that. "Okay."

* * *

It didn't take her long to fall asleep. Once the natural tiredness had kicked in, she was captive to the natural senses of her body and what they were propelling her to do. As Elena watched her slowly succumb to the temptation of sleep, she watched Damon's reaction carefully, as his hand gently tucked a strand of loose hair behind Alexandra's ear.

One of the most rewarding things for Elena to witness, was Damon being a father. It was such a thrill to see him transform from the serial killer she knew initially, to being an actual father who was so tender and loving with his child. It was something she had wanted for them, and now that they had it, she almost couldn't contain her emotions.

"Is she asleep?" Elena whispered.

Damon nodded. "Out like a light."

"Do you want me to take her back?"

"I got her," Damon whispered, as he carefully switched her body from lying on the pillows, to being in his arms as he cradled her against his body in preparation for taking her back to her room for the night. One he disappeared down the hall with her, Elena settled back against her pillows as she waited for Damon's return.

This would be the first time they would be together since his death, and the thought of it was almost too much for her to understand as he finally made his grand reentry.

"Is she still asleep?" Elena asked, as Damon settled himself back on the bed.

"Oh yeah. Hardly flinched except when I went to lay her down."

"You're so good with her, Damon," Elena said, shaking her head in simple awe of the honest of that statement.

"Well," Damon said seriously. "My own father was a monumental screw-up in every department. I figured why pass on the misery he left behind?"

This was typical Damon: attempting to brush off something serious with a light remark. It was what Elena expected from him. Even though she had no idea what his father was like, she knew the ugly story behind him and how he had shot and killed his own sons in cold blood. It was enough to make her secretly hate him for his cruelty.

"Was he really that bad?" She pressed gently.

"Oh, yeah."

"I'm so sorry, Damon."

"Hey," Damon said, rushing to reassure her. "It's not on you to be sorry. It's on that dick to be sorry. Not you."

"I know," Elena said, laying her head on his chest. "I'm still sorry for your pain."

"Thank you."

"So, does it feel good to be back?"

"Yeah," Damon said, a small smile coming across his face. "It feels different still, but it feels good, too."

"I'm glad. Welcome home."


End file.
